Muck Foving

I swear, I can't go a full year without moving at least once. I sort of feel restless if I don't. Hell, I sold my house after only living there for something like 15 months. We are moving this weekend and it's kind of bittersweet. I hate the actual act of moving but moving into almost 4 times the space we've been living in will make it all worth it. Boyf and I have been living in my 376 square foot apartment and it has definitely taken it's toll, especially since I also work here. We are going from 376 square foot studio apartment to a 1200 square foot house. I can totally see myself just wandering aimlessly throughout the house in complete shock for the first few hours of moving in. Maybe I'll run laps from the kitchen through the dining room to living room. Who knows.

There are stacks of boxes and furniture in every single corner of this place. It's literally something out of an episode of Hoarders, minus the 1,743 cats/cat carcasses. I feel so claustrophobic that I try and keep the front door open just to let some light in and bring some space from outside in. (Except that it's raining gatos y perros out there today) Three more days. I can do this.

In the meantime, I've been serenading myself all morning/afternoon to this jem I didn't even know existed until I found it on Spotify:

Beer and loathing in Las Austin

Congress Bridge. Taken by yours truly.

Oh my poor blog! I have totally neglected you! I'll bet everybody has up and forgot about our little corner of the Internet by now. Oh well. Let's just say I've been in intake mode. I'm finally living in Austin proper and I'm loving it. I'm drinking it in....literally.

Everything you hear about Austin is true. It's weird, it's kitchy, it's amazing, it's unlike any other city. I couldn't have picked a better place to up and move to. I've met so many different and wonderful people. Even people I've met in passing and will probably never meet again have made an impression on this heart of mine.

I'm not going to tell you that life has been sunshine and roses. Moving to a new city all by yourself is fucking hard. Not only that but trying to reinvent the person that you once were and letting go of everything you've ever believed in, wanted, and needed is nothing short of the hardest thing I've done in my lifetime so far....well, except for that one time I dislocated my shoulder and had to lay in the road and jam it back in myself. Then I proceeded to ride my bicycle to the bar and party the rest of the night with my little brother and about 100 other Austinites. That was pretty hard too. The dislocating thing, not the partying thing. But that's neither here nor there. I'm broke, I'm lonely, I'm excited, I'm in love, I almost got arrested, I'm confused. It's INSANE.

Some days I wake up and I'm completely happy and content with the way things are going and other days, I wake up and question every decision I've made. It drives me banana sandwich. Let's just say the whole "just be" thing isn't exactly sticking. Why is it that I'm such a control freak? Why can't I just go with the flow? I'm in the middle of hippie central! Surely it will rub off on me soon enough. Right?

Funny thing about this post is that I wanted to talk about Bon Iver and the new album. I don't know what happened but I sat here and my fingers just started typing and here we are. You guys.....*deep breath*...this album is amazing. I'm completely consumed by it. By now y'all know how my obsession can be with music. I'll listen to something non-stop for the better part of a week and then I can move on. I don't know that this will happen with this album. I think it's because it just fits with where I am in life and the way I'm feeling. I've had the chills for two days straight.

This album jumps around so much. One second you will have a slow ballad and the next you have a song that reminds you of the theme song from Growing Pains. There's even a song that features a bicycle bell. Tell me that isn't the cutest thing in life! Justin Vernon is a man after my own heart and he doesn't even know it.

This is probably my favorite song on the record. I could only find the live version since the "web sheriff" is apparently a Nazi when it comes to YouTube. Enjoy.

And I want to tell you,

I was not magnificent

Just Be

My sister sent me an article this week on tips for better sleep. There were a total of five reasons that may cause crappy sleep. However, of these five, I can really only remember two because the others didn't really apply to me. I don't have the article and can't find a link to it, otherwise I would have loved to share it with you.

The first tip that applied to me is avoiding spicy foods. Apparently, the spice can give you heartburn (which I've never, ever had) and cause your body temperature to rise. Um, I'm pretty sure my blood is 5% Cholula. I put it on everything. Salad, soup, cottage cheese, tortillas, sandwiches, eggs, you get the point. I'm still unclear how exactly this causing sleeping issues but avoid spicy foods?! HA!

The second is alcohol, or as the article wrote "The Nightcap". I think a nightcap is what I'm going to call every adult beverage I consume because it just makes it sound so refined and grown up. When someone comes over, regardless the time of day, I'll open the fridge, grab a beer and ask, "Nightcap?" Also, I wish there was a beer called "Highball" because ordering a highball is so much fun. The universe has banned me from drinking hard alcohol to protect myself and those around me that I know and love so I can never order a highball. I've just now decided nightcap and highball are two of my favorite words.

Nightcap?

I'm really getting off track with this. I promise there is a point to this post. Over the last three years, I have had problems with sleeping. I either have crazy, vivid dreams/nightmares or just wake up at some ungodly hour and stay awake while my mind races. There is rarely a night where I sleep the whole night through and when I do, I feel like doing cartwheels down the hallway on my way to the bathroom for my morning pee. (Did the visual make you laugh too?)

Last night was no exception. I woke up around 2:30 AM and my mind instantly fired up. I convinced myself I needed to move back to Utah. Everyone I love is there and living life without me. The mountains are cradling the city, almost protecting it. I miss that protection. I know what restaurants I love and what to order there, I know the best venues to see shows, I know what areas to avoid driving and at what times. I KNOW Salt Lake. I eventually drifted back to sleep until my alarm shook me awake this morning. My first thought this morning was my mind's adventures last night.

Am I moving back to Salt Lake? Not anytime soon. Eventually? Maybe. I'm visiting in May so maybe that will satisfy my craving. Why the hell can't I shake this whole not having a goal thing and just be? I am a week away from moving into my own little place on the eastside of Austin and out of Cedar Park. (Thank goddesses) I even got a FREE bike so that I can start attending the social rides and zip over to downtown whenever I feel like it. Heather, take this time of being single, having no obligations, and getting the opportunity to reinvent yourself into whatever you want while you have it! You are 28 years old and not getting any younger. JUST BE!

Current obsessions

I'm blaming the city of Austin for the following current obsessions:

Lykke Li- Little Bit
I don't know what it is about the petite little Sweeds(The Knifes, Robyn) but they sure are adorable. I love, love, love this song. And more than a little bit. Check out Drake's take on it as well.


Adele- Turning Tables
I was lucky enough to see Adele a few years ago in Utah with James Morrison. Her voice is incredible and her lyrics are heart-wrenchingly beautiful. I haven't been able to stop listening to this song off her new album. This guy also does a pretty beautiful cover.


Passion Pit- Sleepyhead
Passion Pit, to me, is Austin. It's weird, fruity, and makes you feel comfortably awkward. Damn hipsters. Passion Pit radio on Pandora as been in heavy rotation these past few weeks. Not too shabby for a band that initially started out as a dude writing a few songs as a Valentine's Day gift for his girlfriend.


And lastly, I feel it is my moral obligation to let you in on a little hangover cure. I was not a believer until I had a CRIPPLING hangover a couple of months ago. I don't know if it's my old age or what but I can't hang like I used to. I couldn't even sit up and needless to say, I stayed in bed ALL day. My roommate (bless her heart) brought me home a Rockstar Recovery. I shit you not, 15 minutes after I drank it, I felt like Spring morning. I'm hooked. I turned my friend Mike on to them (dude drinks 365) and he wants it on tap at his house. 

Things in Austin are on the up and up. I had a little bit of a rocky road but I'm happy to report that things are changing for the better. I got a second job that I start today. I'm pretty stoked. The extra money will be nice but more importantly, I can't wait to have the human interaction. Working from home is FANTASTIC, don't get me wrong. It's just not very ideal for someone that just moved to a new city.

Lastly, on Saturday I'm going to look at my potential new home!! I love my roommate and am a little sad we won't see each other every day but I want (and need) to be closer to all the action. Hopefully I'll be a resident of the hipster coveted East side of Austin. I'm still on the fence about committing to Austin completely so I'm getting a studio to save on furniture but I've pretty much already decorated the place in my head. Hopefully a post about my adorable new place is in the near future!

QUA?

"Knock knock"
"Who's there?"
"Slutty girls!"
"Slutty girls who?"
"Slutty girls dancing on a shark tank!"


Nobody ever writes about the bad parts of Austin. All you hear about is how amazing this city is. Don't get me wrong, I adore Austin! I think it is a very unconventional, fun, outrageous, crazy, and animated city. I've made some great memories in the very short five months that I've lived here and can't wait for the many memories to come. That being said and just like any other city, there are some shitty places in this town.


Exhibit A:
http://www.yelp.com/biz/qua-bottle-lounge-austin


A couple of friends recently came into town and a friend that lives here really wanted to impress them so she took us to all these different bars. We went to the bar from the link above. Immediately after walking in I was turned off by it. The floor is a shark tank that everybody dances on, which is a cool concept but, all I could think of was how cruel it was to the sharks. How would you feel if a bunch of ugly cougars in pointy boots were dancing erratically on the roof of your house? (Actually, the visual of ladies up on my roof is quite comical.) It was seriously like a frat-party hosted at a retirement home. I wasn't drinking that night so that didn’t help matters either. Regardless, the half hour I lost from visiting QUA was just given back with this Yelp review. I hope you find it as entertaining as I did.

3 days, 8 stages, 130 bands, and 15 different tan lines....

This weekend was a true testament to how old I really am. Three days in the sun, on my feet, treks back and forth from the car to the festival/stage to stage, plus a raging case of allergies can wear a person out. I do have to say that it was a truly amazing experience...expensive but amazing. The bands I saw...deep breath...Miike Snow, Lucero, Band of Horses, M.I.A (who I had no intention of seeing but ended up enjoying), Gogol Bordello, The Black Keyes, Vampire Weekend, Norah Jones..I could keep going but I'm sure you get the gist.

Even more amazing than the bands were the festival goers. Everybody looked out for one another and that was so refreshing. During Lucero, we met the cutest little family that shared their shade with us and told us about their previous ACL experiences. Also, everybody made a conscious effort to keep the park clean. I've been to music festivals before and by the end of the day, it's usually a sea of garbage. Zilker park looked just as clean walking out Sunday night as it did walking in Friday morning.

One disappointment was that I saw one particular and ADORABLE Austin blogger about 15 feet away from me but wasn't completely positive it was her until I text her after we had left to another stage so I didn't get to formally meet her. It needs to happen soon though.

My rock star status was through the roof Saturday when I was allowed access to the AMD VIP area that included real bathrooms, free food, free beer, and most importantly, TONS of shade. We watched the Broken Bells, Gogol Bordello and most of M.I.A in the VIP paradise before heading out of a night on the town. 

All in all, my first year at ACL was a success. Now that I've got some experience under my belt, I'm sure next year will be even more amazing! Hopefully I'll be living closer than I am this year. Being raped by pedi-cabs isn't all it's cracked up to be.

This is my reality

I must say the 21 hours and 1,300ish mile drive to Texas was not even half as bad as I anticipated. We drove all the way to Lubbock, TX the first day. That left only 6 hours worth of driving the second day. Around Clovis, NM is when the delirium started kicking in. We stopped to wash off the bugs from the windshield and get some snacks. I thought it started raining when the sun set but it was actually bugs hitting the windshield. Disgusting. Oh and Stef ate a bug. I'm pretty sure she is still mortified. I shit you not, two days after the fact, out of nowhere she'd say "Dude! I ate a bug. Like, I TASTED it." Sorry Stef.

Can I just say how charming Lubbock, TX is!? We pulled in pretty late on Thursday night and stopped at the first motel we saw so we didn't really even see the town. The next morning we were starving so we ventured out to find breakfast. We stumbled across the cutest Waffle House and had an even cuter waitress. It was just like sitting in your grandma's kitchen and having breakfast. It was great.

We finally pulled up to my new home around 5 PM. When I walked it, it was like I'd walked into a house I decorated. Tin signs, Jack Vettriano, photos of friends, antiques....sigh. I love this house. It has so many cute and kitschy things. It's like I live in an antique shop or museum. And my roommate is basically a rock star. We became instant friends!



P is for poop. Or pee.






Painting of Sarah Bettens





In case you can't find the front door.





I will have this painting in my dining room someday.





Not sure which I should learn first.





Done by Leslie's mom, Terry. Probably my favorite thing in the house!



One of many cigarette ads throughout the house.



Nobody could have prepared me for the humidity though. The first time I walked outside after it rained I almost suffocated. I'm positive I'll never get to straighten my hair here but that's alright. Aside from not having friends yet (working from home doesn't really help with the whole meeting people thing), I'm loving Austin and can't wait to discover the city. I think I will get used to Brad Womack walking right by me on the weekends. ;)

ZZZZzzzzzzz

I'd love to fill you in on the last five days of my life. I'd love to give you the details of my 1,300 mile trek across Utah, Colorado, New Mexico (longest drive through a state EVER), and Texas. I'd love to tell you how Stef ate a bug in Clovis, NM and will probably be haunted by it for the next year or five. I'd love to show you pictures of the most adorable house I'm living in. I'd love to tell you about my awesome roommate. But the fact of the matter is, I'm SO tired that I can't even THINK of how to correctly put a sentence together.

If I'm being 100% honest, the VMA's are on and I haven't had cable in about a year so I'm pretty distracted. Can I just say that it's no longer fashion if you can't even walk in what you are wearing LADY KAKA er, I mean GAGA!? Ahem. Anyway. I've also been trying to catch up on what's going on in the interwebz universe and I'm a bit overwhelmed.

I came across this blog post from my girl Sue and thought I'd share. I love this girl and I kept myself together this whole move until I said goodbye to her and then I lost it again somewhere in New Mexico when I read her card. I'll be representing during my exploration of Austin and knock the cities socks off until you come and visit me Mija! Thanks for the t-shirt.

Is it me does this t-shirt look Texas orange? It's really red. WEIRD!

And man I'm, I'm just in Chicago

As I've mentioned before, one of my besties recently moved to Chicago. I went to visit her and it totally prepared me for my own upcoming move. I did a lot of observing and asking questions since she is basically doing what I'm about to do. The difference is that she has her sister there although, they are completely different in every single way. The only thing they have in common is DNA.

I found myself alone while she was at work and navigating myself to the nearest grocery store, which was quite the adventure. When nothing is familiar, you do much more observing and mimicking. I found myself being even more out-going as I usually am, just to have someone give me that nod of understanding or see the look of complete desperation in my eyes that totally gave away that I was an outsider. I felt like everyone I walked past was watching me like a hawk because I couldn't be trusted. It was very odd.

Insecurity turns me into the clumsiest person ever. I become so overwhelmed that I'm blinded. Boarding the bus, I couldn't even figure out where to insert my pass properly. I'm not even shitting you, a blind man hopped on the bus the next stop and without hesitation, bam. He even knew. However, I did manage to navigate my way all by myself from Christina's house to the airport via public transit the day I left. Do you know how accomplished I feel? Yeah, people do it every day but I grew up in a small ass town that doesn't even have taxi service let alone a bus system. I even had to ride a bus AND train. I know, I know. I'm that awesome.

On the plane ride home, I sat next to a very attractive gentleman. (Silver wedding band included.) We exchanged small "single-serving friend" talk before I put in my headphones and drifted off to sleep. Only I woke up in a violent shake that resulted in me hitting him about 30 minutes later. Yeah, I'm the graceful type. I'm still embarrassed when I think about it and he's probably long since forgot about being a punching bag on flight 1974.

I know I've probably talked about me moving both to you reading and those who know me in real life way too much but it's always on my mind. Always. Truth is, I'm scared as fuck. I'm not even sure this is the right decision. I'm leaving everything and everyone I know and love to chase some crazy dream. Every boundary I've made and lived by is slowly losing its borders. Any and all routines I had are now a thing of the past. I honestly considered just sending for my clothes and staying in Chicago. I really hope this works out. If I cause myself extreme loneliness and clumsiness for nothing, I'm really going to be pissed.

Anyone want to visit Austin? I'll cook breakfast! I'm totally serious.

Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same

Give me any reason to believe
'Cause I swear I'm done here
'Cause I see a bigger picture
And I'm looking for some answers


Tell me that it's worth it
'Cause I'm doing all I can to fight it
But I've never been this scared
My moment's finally here
Mayday Parade- Still Breathing


My reality is finally sinking in. My nerves are wired directly to my intestines, causing me a painful bellyache daily. I'm starting to sell off the pieces of me that I've worked so hard for to make the journey a light one....and possible one. Everything that makes my "home" will now make someone elses home. While my possessions don't make me who I am, it is still weird to part with it all. It's sort of like giving up a part of myself, which now that I think about it, that is essentially what I'm doing. I'm giving up everything I'm comfortable with, everything I know, for something completely foreign. (Somewhere Down In Texas just came on)

I've made this decision before but the leap was, well, just that. A leap. A 120 mile leap from a small town to a small city. Now I'm making the 1,300 mile jump from small city to big city. Alone. Before, I had a familiar face to help with the transition. At least I have my cuddle buddy coming with. Hopefully he likes it. I feel like I have to be calm and confident for him through all of this. Seriously, this sounds ridiculous even as I type it but I watched the finale of Grey's Anatomy this weekend and OH. MY. GOD. I was SO stressed. I bawled ok? Like the kind of cry where you can't make any noise but it looks like your shoulders are having a seizure and your eyes are pouring buckets down your face. You should have seen this poor dog. And this is just from a TV show that I don't even follow regularly. Imagine when I move 1,300 miles away. Poor Sailor.

I've spent this weekend just sifting through all this shit I've accumulated in my 27 years. While organizing/purging/packing, I've come up with some questions for myself.

Why have I kept half the shit I've kept? Take the 2000 edition dictionary I've lugged around for the last decade for instance. How appropriate is it to actually own a dictionary when we live in a world with Google? Also, why did my mom feel it was even an appropriate Christmas gift? She must've drank a lot of egg nog that year. Don't fret. The dictionary is now in the "get rid of this shit already" box.

Was it really necessary to bring home that rock from the Oregon coast? Or those cheap ass beads they were passing out like hot cakes for St. Patrick's Day in Chicago? Yeah, I get the significance of a souvenir or two but what am I supposed to do with these now? They're just going to sit in a box that my children will have to sift through once I'm dead and probably curse me for being such a hoarder. Sorry future kids! Momma's a nut job....much like grandma! Oh my god. I'm becoming my mother.

Speaking of becoming my mother, why do I find it necessary to stock up on grooming products, cleaner, lotions, etc? I found two full bottles of hand soap from Bath and Body Works, two tubes of brand new tooth paste, various hair products I've never even used, and countless little trial size lotions. I could open a mini-convenience store in my bathroom. My mom does the same thing and it used to annoy me so bad.

Final question: What exactly does one do with a wedding ring? I know what you're thinking. "Wow. What a classy guy. He let her keep the ring." Yeah, so classy I got to keep the ring that I paid for. It's a pretty ring and totally my style but do you think it even thinks about fitting on any other finger? The last thing I want to do is walk around wearing a diamond advertising that I'm married. What the hell do I do with this thing? Sell it? Would I get what I paid for it? Anyone know of anybody needing a size 4.5 wedding ring? Send 'em my way. It'd pay off my credit cards.

I wish it was September. It's snowing right now in the SLC. Ugh.

Reason number 247 I will miss this Salty City

This girl. My Sue.

Hey Darlin' Do You Gamble?

Yes. Yes I do. Only with my heart though. It's looking like Texas.